Decided to stay for homework help, forgot to text me.
Likelihood: 0
Time Travel in Sequels
SPOILERS for Terminator, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, and Harry Potter and the Cursed Child ahead. Read more…
Archive Posts (Page 22)
Etymology of Congress
Source: Link Read more…
Possible Reasons @sophster is 22 Minutes Late for Pickup on her First Day of School
Busy finishing up some work.
Likelihood: 0
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Other People We Should Give a Microphone and a Prime Time Spot So They Can Criticize Donald Trump
This is working people. Let’s bait him some more. He can’t help saying hateful things. I suggest a rolling schedule of attacks from things everybody likes, all the way to Election Day. Read more…
Summer is fast approaching its end...these are some of my fondest memories of Summer's past 🌞🌜✨
Inspired by @NumbahTwo Read more…
Authors on Consciously or Subconsciously Planting Symbolism in their Work
Gathered from the Internet, mostly in response to surveys sent by Bruce McAllister as recounted here: Link Read more…
Everyone looks cooler in black and white with 70s fashion. Even king of the dorks, Tim Kaine.
On Primaries
This is an ill-formed set of primordial thoughts demanding deeper understanding on my part. Stuff I’ve been thinking about a lot. Read more…
Good news: I don’t have tuberculosis.
Related: I didn’t think I had tuberculosis. But now I know for sure. Also, I don’t use illegal drugs. Also, I can now volunteer at the prisons.
Me 2015: Internet trolls are people who’s only motive is to anger you. They’re an unfortunate consequence of online anonymity but for the most part the best policy is to ignore them entirely.
Me 2016: Wait do we still ignore them when they’re running for president?
Do any countries have a tax policy so progressive they have a negative income tax rate at the lowest brackets?
Proposed: We should rename Cottage Cheese. Because it is delicious but that name … 😷
How I learn about the existence of ostensibly popular bands: They come to Phoenix and all you people post to Facebook about it.
It’s a good thing the seat of government isn’t in North Carolina or Hillary wouldn’t be allowed to use the bathroom in the Oval Office.
Addendum to my previous post: It makes my happy that my daughter’s first vote in an election can be, should she choose, for a woman as president of the United States.
Important Questions for First Gentleman Bill Clinton
Will you be redecorating the presidential bedroom right away or do you plan to take your time?
Have you selected a color scheme?
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Well, I have to say I’m very happy to see our first major party female candidate. All the complexity of this election cycle aside, this is a good day for America.
I don’t know what keeps happening in this city but I’m totally ok with it.
Aside: I’ve only had Lou Malnati’s once yet, but it is in my neighborhood and it was absolutely fantastic.
Appropriate Responses to List App Changes
“Oh my stars and garters!”
“Well I never!”
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Sometimes I have this sentimental vision that some day space travel will be so inexpensive that we’ll go around the solar system gathering up all our long-dead probes and rovers and bring them home to make the coolest space history museum imaginable.
I Like My Women Like I Like My Coffee
I don’t possess any coffee.
I don’t possess any women.
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Proposed: The two party system is the best defense we have against someone like Trump becoming president. The open primary system undermines the role of parties in selecting and promoting strong consistent competent candidates. We may have thrown the baby out with the bath water with the McGovern-Fraser Commission. You have no constitutional right to pick candidates. Only presidents. Maybe we should roll back some of the democratic processes in the party nominating process.
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Reporters and commentators are supposed to stick to what is conscious and with literal meaning. But most real political discourse makes use of unconscious thought, which shapes conscious thought via unconscious framing and commonplace conceptual metaphors. George Lakoff
Sophia: “Do you like Michelle Obama?”
Me: [answers]
Sophia: “What about regular Obama?”
Read Please
I don’t mean to be bossy but @Lindi is right and this is another smart take. Read more…
This is smart commentary on opposing Trump:
[ed: The original link no longer works so I’ve updated this to point to archive.org instead.]
(Aside: If you feel put upon by his language on race, save it. I can’t bear any more middle class educated white christians complaining about how persecuted they are. I’ve reached my limit.)
Reason We Were Late
My kids’ elementary school had a form you had to sign when you were late. It asked why you were late. This is none of their business of course (not that I fault them for asking). These are the reasons I gave over the years. I hope they’re in a database somewhere. Read more…
Things That Happened on My Birthday
1649: Elie Wiesel’s fictional trial of God takes place.
1713: Frederick the First of Prussia, grandfather of Frederick the Great, dies.
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I saw Ghost Busters
Fair disclosure: I’m not really a fan of the original. I genuinely don’t get why it is so popular. I was really young when I first saw it though so maybe that tainted me.
I have tried twice to re-watch it as an adult but got bored and turned it off both times. None of this is a dig at the movie itself. Lots of people I admire love this movie like a child.
Anyway my number one response to the new one is: That’s it? What’s all the fuss about?
I assumed there must be some heavy handed “man bashing” in there somewhere to rile so many people up but there wasn’t at all. Confused.
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You Have a Dozen Donuts to Buy, What Is the Prefect Combination?
Inspired by @wallflower, who I respect immensely but she is misguided. From Rainbow Doughnuts in north phoenix (not the same as rainbow doughnuts in east phoenix). Read more…
Do you think 50 years ago when American astronauts were circling the dark side of the moon, and in the silence and isolation, they got to philosophizing together about what the world would be like in 50 years, any of them suggested maybe, 50 years later…
America wouldn’t even have the technology to put a person in space at all anymore?
It must be strange to have had a front seat to that comedown.
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The radio in my newish Honda Accord is far and away the fanciest most advanced version I’ve ever owned. I know it is fancy because:
It’s interface is inscrutable. Case in point, the “main menu” has, among other things, buttons labeled “Audio”, “Audio”, and “Source” all three of which show the same screen. I have no idea what the difference between these is.
Even when you manage to find the right button you are still annoyed by the aggravatingly slow low-frame-rate linear animations.
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Kinds of French Toast
I’m an expert French Toast maker here to tell you what you’re doing wrong. With apologies to @Lisa_Fav and @MaiaLS; I’m sure this stuff isn’t really French. Read more…
Look At All These Violent People At The Black Lives Matter Forum In Phoenix Tonight
I saw on Facebook that Black Lives Matter is a violent terrorist organization so we went to a meeting to see how bad it was. Look what we found. Read more…
I wonder if Joanie still loves Chachi after this.
Mythical creatures I would like to be
Everybody knows the four elements are:
Earth
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Aside: Why do we capitalize days of the week? It just seems wrong.
How do you say no to sweet Sophia when she stumbles out of bed and asks for a cheese omelet at 10:30 at night? Especially after she spent hours on Saturday making homemade pizza dough, homemade sauce, and homemade ice cream for Sunday dinner?
The girl loves her cheese omelets.
I feel like this passage from Crime and Punishment says more about politics than about romance.
There’s nothing in the world more difficult than candor, and nothing easier than flattery. If there is only the hundredth part of a false note in candor, there is immediately a dissonance, and then—scandal. But with flattery, even if everything is false down to the last little note, it is still agreeable and is listened to not without pleasure; crude though the pleasure may be, it is still a pleasure.
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Look west phoenix friends. Mercury, low in the sky.
Amateur Facebook Mistakes
This is why I turn off all Facebook notifications. Read more…
Questions Sophia has asked me in the last thirty minutes:
does a dead body count as a person for the carpool lane? does a brain dead person who is technically still alive count? does a body part count? brain in a jar? what if your passenger dies while you’re driving in the lane? if dead people counted would ashes of a person count? would a shrunken head count? would it count if it could talk?
Read more…
My Work History
I can’t believe I’ve never made this list. Read more…
Today I learned that Bastille Day is not called Bastille Day in France. Happy fete nationale to our oldest friends! 🇫🇷
Things I Like More Than Pokémon Go
I don’t even have the app because I am an inept gamer who doesn’t get it most of the time. What do you do with a Pokémon once you catch it? Nobody can explain this to me. Read more…
I think my biggest complaint in life right now is that Safari won’t let you open the web inspector on pages that aren’t showing HTML even though it actually works with those pages if it is already open.
In other words, I live a pretty charmed life.
Sophia: Can I…
Me: This is a standing order: “no”. You may file an appeal in writing if you feel any particular future circumstance warrants it.