My proposed congressional bill.
Whereas incessant honking outside my window induces unhealthy rage which is potentially harmful to the people of these United States, the following shall take effect immediately:
- If any vehicle is sold in the United States with the capacity to honk repeatedly against the wishes of its operator, the CEO of the vehicle manufacturer shall be subjected to 300 consecutive hours, in a standing position, of a loud looping recording of Sara Palin being sassy.
- If any unoccupied vehicle honks repeatedly outside my office window, it shall be lawful for me to throw a brick through its window or push it into the lake, at my discretion.