Sophia: “What book is that?”
Isabel: “Because of Winn Dixie.”
Sophia: “Oh, I love that book!”
Me: “You know why I love that book?”
Sophia: “Why?”
Me: “Because of Winn Dixie.”
OH MY GOSH MY KIDS ARE SO LUCKY I’M THEIR DAD.
Facebook Archive (Page 29)
I created a Facebook account in 2012 but didn’t really post much until 2014. In 2018 I deleted my account (for secret reasons). It was a relief to let it go, but also a little sad. I quickly lost tabs of friends and extended family. Of course we still talk now and again, but I am much less aware of what’s going on in their day to day lives. Nevertheless I’m glad I left.
In an act of unbridled vanity, I have archived all the old posts here.
My Posts
What a lovely, eye-opening, and exciting XKCD.
Vincenzo made homemade marinara atop perfect pasta with a sprinkling of parmigiana. Mamie made a refreshing light salad with lemon vinaigrette. Mediterra Bakery made the always-awesome bread. Sophia made an epic apple pie. And then we had a lovely dinner with my parents. Such a nice night.
Sophia: “If you need me I’ll be outside waiting for Vincenzo.”
[1 minute later]
Sophia: “I got cold.”
So the other day I honked at a guy who was taking too long to realize the light was green, and then when he pulled away I realized I wasn’t in gear, and it took me a bit to get going. Just thought I should confess.
The purple pie man at work. Too bad this one is for the school “feast” tomorrow so I don’t get any. Apple, by the way.
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Sophie had a rough night so I played the song “Lean on Me” for her and then said, “I’ll make you a deal. When you need someone to lean on, lean on me. And when I need someone to lean on, I’ll lean on you.”
She said, “But you’re so big…”
I made a crock-pot chicken and rice thing the other day with brussels sprouts and although it tasted fine, it smelled pretty horrible. (Don’t blame me, it was the internet’s fault.) Mamie came home and said, “It has quite a brassica smell.” Which apparently is latin for “poop.”
Sometimes I hear things like “Congress’ approval rating has fallen to 9%” and I think, Who are these 9% and what in the world do they approve of? Does congress itself get like 27,000 votes in this poll or something?
Because really, I know anecdotal blah blah blah, but I don’t know anybody who thinks congress is anything but a disaster at this point.
Friends:
My wife is running in the St. Jude half marathon fundraiser next month. She is $200 short of her fundraising goal and would appreciate donations of any amount. Donations are due by Friday.
Link
For those who don’t know, St. Jude provides life-saving medical care to children regardless of ability to pay, and they are able to provide this service through charitable contributions from ordinary people like us.
Our friend lost her daughter to cancer last year, but there are still thousands of families fighting this harrowing battle with the help of St.
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Actual Apple Maps driving directions. I guess the last step is “get out and walk” or something. Not sure.
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Sophia: Was Darth Vader always bad?
Me: No, he used to be Anakin Skywalker who was a good guy.
Sophia: What would make him turn so bad?
Me: I don’t know, his girlfriend wouldn’t go out with him anymore or some dumb thing like that.
Oh Star Wars how you let us down.
For about the 10th time I just heard someone say he’s a man, but Obamacare forces him to pay for prenatal care. Ok people, listen closely. I positively guarantee you if your doctor bills Blue Cross for a prenatal visit, and you’re a man, they will deny the charge. You can count on this. So by any practical measure, you do not have coverage for prenatal care. This whole line of thinking is bordering on silly.
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An actual review on Amazon for Charlotte’s Web. Presented without comment.
This book was absolutely the worst thing I ever read. My children were scared, horrified, and bored. I found the book to pontificate needlessly, to overdress otherwise humorous and warm situations with disgusting psycho-sexual overtones, and to instill, in myself (at least for a day) and my children (forever?), a feeling of hollow sadness and bitterness at this calous author.
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Every time I pull out the flimsy articulated paper catcher on my inkjet printer I’m reminded of the AT-STs from Star Wars. The ones that were taken out easily by low-IQ teddy bears armed with sticks and stones.
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Power pose at the Science Center. Harry Potter event was a let down, but the Science Center is always fun so everybody was happy.
Butterbeers. That’s $20 worth of doctored cream soda there. VALUE. But it’s for a good cause so, like, whatever.
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I got the sweetest Thank You note last night and, after a long day of meetings and work, it totally made my day.
CC Ariah Masters
Sophia: “I’m going to tell you everything about my day from head to toe. Actually, from toe to head, because I want to save the best part for last. Well, hmm, actually I don’t like to label…Ok, in this story the head represents the best part, but that’s just for this story because really heads and toes are both important.”
[followed by a 20 minute monologue detailing her day]
Isabel’s first quarter grades came out on Tuesday but we still don’t have them because the incredibly lousy “family link” portal on the school’s “schoolmaster” computer system is broken. Every time I deal with these kinds of things I wonder how software companies can be so bad at their jobs and still make money.
Paging Ernest Koe. Your skills are desperately needed.
One of the many things I love about Sophia is that every time I drop her off at school, there’s always one or two little tiny first or second graders who are super excited to see her and tell her something. She must be such a nice 6th grader…
This is entertainment: Sophie and her friends set Mamie’s phone to French. Then Sophie and Izzie mumbled french-like noises into it, and Maia, who actually speaks French, interpreted Siri’s responses. Somehow they managed to get it to give them a weather report.
Isabel and I came to Tempe to see Amy Tan speak tonight and it just happened to be grand opening day at the first Steak ’n Shake in Arizona. I’m in childhood reverie here with my beautiful date.
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A phone call in one act:
[Ring Ring]
Me: Hello?
Caller: Hi! This is Alizona. Is Sophdakota home?
Me: Yes. Yes she is.
It is fun being a parent sometimes.
I have come to the realization that no matter what I do, what furniture I acquire, what clothing I procure, or how I compose myself, I will never be as comfortable, for even 5 minutes, as my cat is about 85% of her time.
Dave Ramsey explains why the way healthcare works effectively in the rest of the world is mathematically impossible, and the dysfunctional way it works in America is necessary. Dream big, America.
Sophia’s in breakfast heaven this week. In honor of her new braces (and in deference to her sore teeth) we’re having a different hot grain cereal each day. Cream of Wheat yesterday. “Special” Oatmeal today. Corn meal mush tomorrow.
These are a few of her favorite things. Any suggestions for Friday?
Sylvester Stallone should make a movie about an actor who used to play boxers, but now he’s too old to play a boxer and for some reason he has to come out of retirement to play a boxer one more time.
Me: I put an ibuprofen in your lunch box. Take it at lunch time.
Sophia: We have to have a note, and medicine has to be turned in at the office, then I go down to the office to take it at lunch time.
Me: You don’t have to do all that just for one ibuprofen one time.
Sophia: Yes we do. We have to do it even for cough drops.
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Isabel’s reading Catcher in the Rye today.
Me: How’s Holden?
Isabel: Good.
Me: Is he making bad decisions?
Isabel: No. Well, unless you count leaving his school and …
So this just happened:
Sophia: “Get me a glass of water.”
Me: “Get it yourself. I’m not your servant.”
Sophia: “Eh…I’m not that thirsty.”
[5 minutes later, I get myself a glass of water, drink half of it, and then because I’m a softy I take the rest to her.]
Me: Wait, you have a glass of water already.
Sophia: Oh yeah. I forgot about that.
Look what’s going on in our neighborhood today. They’re replacing several poles in the hard-to-access easements. I wish my little buddy Liam was here. This was pretty cool to see up close.
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The way I figure it, carrots never make anybody cry. So all you molecular biologists out there please GMO me up some onions with the no-cry gene from a carrot please. It burrrrrrrrnnnnnnns…
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Sophia found a new favorite painting. “I like how the picture goes on to the frame. And she did a good job making the blood look like some of it is drying out.”
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Facebook is just recycling old posts in my news feed right now. Interpretation: You’re all watching breaking bad instead of posting to facebook.
Today Sophia asked me why a painted typographic business sign she saw looked so “wrong”. I explained the concept of kerning and the paradoxical phenomenon that what is mathematically precise doesn’t always “look right”. This, I said, is one thing that separates good typography from bad.
We had a lovely discussion and then she said, “Adrian Monk would be a TERRIBLE typographer.”
She can work Monk into any conversation.
I’m not usually a fan of rant-music, but this one is done with so much humor and self-effacing unpretentiousness that when the rant starts to escalate it is really great. Another iTunes Radio discovery.
I think if you lined up all the laundry you ever washed, it would tell a touching story of your life.
I dropped off Sophie’s application for 7th grade at Metropolitan Arts today and the place was crawling with kids with wild hair in crazy outfits. It was very cute. Can you say “cute” about middle- and high-schoolers? Anyway: Cute.