Don’t tell me what I’ll love, ViralNova. I’ll decide that.
Facebook Archive (Page 26)
I created a Facebook account in 2012 but didn’t really post much until 2014. In 2018 I deleted my account (for secret reasons). It was a relief to let it go, but also a little sad. I quickly lost tabs of friends and extended family. Of course we still talk now and again, but I am much less aware of what’s going on in their day to day lives. Nevertheless I’m glad I left.
In an act of unbridled vanity, I have archived all the old posts here.
My Posts
I wish CNN would run a front page story every time an American teen is killed with a gun, not just when the victim is pretty, white, middle class, and a few of her friend go down with her. Not because I fault them for running the stories that get page views. But because I think it would properly illustrate the real breadth of the problem.
Hint: There’d be 6-10 front page stories every day, 7 days a week.
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The girls went in that house five minutes ago and all I’ve heard since is terrified screaming. Perfect crime.
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Left to right: Hannibal, injured person, the daughter of Elsa and Jack Frost, and a pirate.
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I just realized my giant Costco bag of assorted name brand chocolate bars doesn’t include Snickers. That’s like buying a bag of assorted mobile devices and it turns out to be all Samsungs.
When you have little kids you have to plan lots of activities for their parties to keep things moving. When you have teens you just have to get out of the way of the party. But with tweens I think by law you have to provide activities that you know they will ignore as they giggle and scream in a pack in a bedroom or in the back yard.
Helmet construction part 1: make a pattern.
Helmet construction part 2: turn the pattern into flat pieces.
[skip a million steps because dad was distracted] Helmet Construction part [N]: assemble cut foam.
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Her exact words: “So what if there’s an arrow sticking out of my arm. Soon there will be a Carthaginian flag sticking out of Rome!”
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She made the sword from insulation foam, air dry clay, batting, and leather strap. The helmet is EVA foam.
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Sophia’s Hannibal costume, which she made herself. Lots and lots of work and I think it came out great.
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Needs an editor:
“The quarantine attempt is shaping up as the nation’s biggest test case yet in the struggle to balance p̶u̶b̶l̶i̶c̶ ̶h̶e̶a̶l̶t̶h̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ fear of Ebola against personal freedom.”
Fixed that for you.
Also, thank you, your honor.
Sophia made these super-cute mummy cupcakes for her school Halloween party tomorrow. Eyeballs too.
I think the mummies were Isabel’s idea.
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Apparently I drive the same car as Maple’s mom so when I pull up to the school she sometimes jumps up and I have to roll down the window and yell, “It’s just me Maple.”
Also, Maple is tall and thin like a maple tree. This has nothing to do with my story but it always makes me smile.
Ok, I make a lot of jokes about irrational reaction to Ebola but I’ll be serious for 5 seconds. If you are worried, the best thing you can do to protect America is go here and make a donation:
Link
Of course there’s no reason for Americans to be worried about their own health. But there are many reasons to help stop the current outbreak in West Africa. Every American who has contracted Ebola got it while selflessly helping incredibly sick people.
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Sophia doesn’t always cry, but when she does it is because someone else is sad. It’s hard sometimes to be a little person with such a big heart.
This is what happens when your gun laws are reactionary and poorly thought through. Real, credible threats of violence, and the university believes that by law they can’t stop people from bringing guns to an event.
Utah, get your crap together. Utah State University, don’t be such legal weenies. Post a sign and don’t let guns in. Let the state sue you if they want. It is obviously the right thing to do.
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Sophia learned she can get a free college education in Germany and immediately began studying German. Clever Germans.
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Taking half a day off here to get some personal things done and get a little needed rest. Oh and to make Creme Brûlée.
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Sophia: You’re the best thing that ever happened to me!
Me: I didn’t really happen to you. You just came into existence and there I was.
Sophia: Yeah but I could have come to…like…Hitler.
“People often say that same-sex marriage now is like interracial marriage in the 60s. But in terms of public opinion, same-sex marriage now is like interracial marriage in the 90s, when it had already been legal nationwide for 30 years.”
Mamie: “You pigged out and ate all yours even though I told you to save some for tomorrow.”
Sophia: “I live in the moment.”
But we got some neat slow-motion video of this cool acts-wet-but-is-really-dry non-Newtonian sand stuff.
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Tried to get a picture of these munchkins on our date last night but Sophia was in her own world.
Also, Angie, don’t ask me what she was wearing.
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Sophia: [jokingly] “You just wish I would go away and leave the family.”
Me: “Oh no no. If I wanted someone to leave our family you wouldn’t be my first choice.”
Isabel: “Who exactly would be your first choice?!”
Me: “Me.”
This is why my children need therapy.
Isabel and I went to the rare book room at Burton Barr branch of the Phoenix Public Library today. We got to see awesome little tiny cuneiform tablets, a Shakespeare second folio, a 16th century Eclogues of Virgil, a first edition of Twain’s first widely successful work, a (rare) certified first edition of Origin of the Species, and a bunch of other cool stuff. Oddly, there were no kindles.
Link
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Me: “Why are you yelling at me?”
Sophia: [grhrhrhrhrhr]
Me: “Is it because I’m solving your problem for you before school even though you didn’t tell me about it until the last minute, and I didn’t give you the slightest hard time about it?”
Sophia: “NO.”
Me: “Then help me understand why you’re yelling.”
Sophia: “BECAUSE I’M GRUMPY.”
Well now, that’s something I can totally understand.
Me: “Hop in the shower and try to calm down, sweetie.
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Yesterday Isabel got Orville Redenbacher and Arnold Schwarzenegger confused.
Same basic thing.
I’m not pre-ordering an iPhone this time, but I happen to be up working and I see the apple store isn’t up at all right now. There must be some heads rolling over there…
I have mystery water in my closet. Coming from a wall that has no plumbing. And once we tore the carpet out and investigated, it went away and now I have no idea if I should recarpet and call it good, or burn the house down.
Sophia livin’ the dream.
Thanks, Todd Stangle, for the picture! CC: Metropolitan Arts Institute
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Sophia finished reading The Wind in the Willows tonight and now we’re watching the old 1987 ABC television special movie version. I haven’t seen this in years. It is so great.
Found this on my iPad. I think Taylor’s afraid of the cat..
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DELETE FROM facebook.posts WHERE posts.title like "%you won't believe%";
Whenever I see a raft of Facebook birthday posts, I think if this old gem: Link
What if an extra-terrestrial intelligent civilization has found us, but the only data they can interpret is Youtube comments.
I’m so excited for Sophia to come home from her first day at a new school that I can’t concentrate on my work.
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to feel anything as deeply as Sophia feels everything.
She is really going to miss Maïa.
I accidentally threw back before thursday. I hope you don’t all unfriend me at once.
I get tons of call from some spanish-language telemarketing who-knows-what lately so I’ve taken to talking to them in my 20-years-forgotton high school spanish. It is fun:
Caller: [uninteligible fast spanish]
Me: ¡Claro que si!
Caller: [more spanish I don’t understand]
Me: Oh si, si si.
Caller: [blabbity-blah-blah]
Me: ¡Es muy importante para abrir la boca!
Caller: [confused sounding spanish]
Me: Me gustaría un taco, por favor. ¡Tengo mas hambre que un elefante!
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